It's all built up, time to let it out.

Well after days of debating and crying ounces of tears, I've decided to join my works Biggest Loser competition.  I already have the best co-workers in the world, I know they will be super supportive of me. 

I'm at the heaviest I've ever been. EVER.  And if I don't change things, I may not be able to watch my little girl grow up and grow old with my husband.  My body aches, my feet hurt and I can't walk a block with out being winded, we wont even mention how hard it is for me to do the stairs at my house.

I've spent my whole life fat.  FAT, I'm not even going to cushion it, I'm far from chunky, chubby, obese and even morbidly obese.  I'm a couple of my co-workers in one.  I'm a few super models in one.  I've been teased. I've been humiliated. I've been embarrassed. I've been harassed.  I've been ashamed.  I'm tired of being all these things.  Growing up, I got made fun of.  DAILY.  Classmates, friends and my Brother teased and made fun of me daily.  I got called every name in the book, fatty, two ton tonya, big bertha, elephant, hippo, pig, Roseann (I'd be happy to be her size now) and many many more. 

My grandpa tried to buy my weight.  I couldn't even be motivated by money to lose.  I remember the first time I had to get off a roller coaster because I didn't fit.  The joker ride.  Humiliated.  I've squeezed into seats at stadiums and listened to the people next to me make fun and make rude comments because I was "squishing" them.  I got called up in front of an airport full of people to be told I was too big to fly and needed to purchase a second ticket.  Tears. 

Dating. Horrible. That's all I'm saying on this subject.  I am so lucky that I met my husband who loves me no matter what.  Who doesn't look at me like a fat person.  Just his beautiful wife.

My whole life I've been fighting my weight.  Every time I get my hopes crushed, or I get depressed or lonely, I eat.  It doesn't make sense, something that makes me so sad, I turn too.  It's an addiction.  It's comfort.  It's my friend. 

My uncle said it best "food was my friend & my friend is killing me".  I don't want to die this way.  I am too young to be thinking about dieing. 

2012 - bring it!

1st Birthday Party Planning

I've been thinking about Livi's first birthday since she came home from the hospital.  Her birthday is less then a week a way and I still don't have it done/planned!  I just placed her cake order with KlassyKakes KC I can't wait to see the final product.  We are doing a Minnie Mouse theme with hot pink and Zebra decorations.  I ordered a cute banner from an Etsy seller.  Balloons are a must, but what else do I need?  Olivia can't have a lot of party guest due to her BPD and her lungs are still damaged from her being a preemie.  It's easy for her to catch colds and get RSV, which can turn deathly in infants, especially preemies.

Do I plan games?  Do we have snacks? Do I give party favors?  Off to the internet I go to get some tips.  Here's what I got from AmazingMom.

BABY'S 1ST BIRTHDAY PARTY TIPS
When should I have my party?

• Keep the party short 1 to 1-1/12 hours is about the most a one year old can handle without getting over stimulated and possibly cranky.
• Schedule around nap times. Late morning, allows for a morning nap or late afternoon to allow for an afternoon nap.
• Weekend parties usually work better for parents and other adults.

How many guest should I invite?

• Most first birthday parties are for the adults in your child's life (family and friends). Invite the most special friends and relatives.
• Keep it to a manageable number of guests for you and your space. Keep in mind, that you will be caring for your little one at the same time.
• If you intend to invite other babies or toddlers 1- 3 guests is ideal with a maximum of 5.
• Parents of little ones should be included as guests so they can assist their children and you if necessary.

Should I serve food?

• Although it is not necessary to provide a meal, finger foods are always nice. Especially with babies.
• Check with ALL parents regarding food allergies and safety. Keep packaging fun but safe.

What else should I keep in mind?

• Be flexible! All parents know that children and their behaviors are not predictable. Un-scheduled rests, tears, accidents etc. are to be expected at a baby's first birthday. Just relax and go with the flow.
• To help you be flexible...arrange for help from a reliable friend or family member who can watch your child or entertain while you change a diaper, pick up a spill etc.
• If you plan on having children at the party keep plenty of toys and activities available to keep them occupied.
• Baby-proof the party space.
• Parents are often looking for a healthy alternative to the standard, birthday cake for their baby's first cake.

Wish us Luck!

Article: Start Losing Weight Today!

I have been saying for months "I am going to lose weight", "today is the day", "I'll start tomorrow".  Tomorrow hasn't arrived yet.  I find every excuse to not do it.  I need to, I'm killing myself.  I Have a goal to lose 30 pounds by my daughters first birthday, well that's next week and I don't see that happening, unless I cut off my foot! 

Anyway, I do read articles about weightloss and diets and food and all that jazz, and I wanted to share this one with you.  I actually got it from my work, they are all about making my us "healthy".  I've gotten some good pointers and suggestions and will be posting them as I feel worthy.

Enjoy!

Start Losing Weight Today! Five things you can do now to make this plan work for the long-term. by Heather Zeitz, R.D., C.D.N. When you start a new weight-loss plan, you need to go step-by-step. Don't overwhelm yourself with too much information or high expectations. If you want to keep the weight off for good then this is a long-term commitment. But you do want to use your energy and excitement to get yourself on the right track. Below are five things you can do right now that can help you have success. You can do this! Step One: Set Your Goal One of the keys when making any change is to have a clear goal. Long-term goal: What's your ideal goal weight? Establish a healthy, achievable and sustainable weight-loss goal with our Diet Manager tool. You'll get a personalized meal plan, an on-line journal, and quick tips to help you reach your goal. Check in a few times a week! Short-term goal: Now look at the next six weeks and decide on a realistic starting point. A good short-term goal would be to lose five pounds through the first six weeks. Remember, it's important that your short-term goal be achievable! Step Two: Learn the Basics on Calories Many diet plans have complicated formulas and ratios. But the basics of weight loss are simple: Consume less, burn more: To lose weight, you need to burn more calories than you consume. Our plan will help you be satisfied on fewer calories, while encouraging you to stay active and burn more calories. Step Three: Choose Your Foods Wisely! Learn portion control: Identify any foods that you're more likely to overeat. Common problem foods include: ice cream, cakes, cookies, full-fat cheese, pizza and red meat. Cut back on these first. Read labels carefully and watch how much goes on your plate. Remember these tips to help visualize your portions: 1 cup is about the size of a baseball. 1/2 cup is close to the size of a computer mouse. A deck of cards is equal to about 3 oz. of protein. Pick healthy favorites! Now for the fun part. Find healthy foods that you can substitute for your high-calorie favorites. Pick foods you like! Your meal plan (which you can access from your Diet Manager) will give you ideas. Write them down! Start recording your eating habits in food journal. This is a proven strategy for weight loss. Use our Progress Tracker to record your foods online or just use a notepad. Stick with it! Feel full on fewer calories! If you fill your plate with lean protein-rich foods, fruits, vegetables and whole grains, you'll feel more satisfied. Soups are a great example of a food that can fill you up on fewer calories. "Several studies show that soup eaters end up weighing less than non-soup eaters," says Penn State nutrition professor Barbara Rolls, Ph.D. Step Four: Make a Plan to Exercise Make it easy: To make your plan work you have to get moving! Identify at least three exercises you can do easily and conveniently. Schedule it: Get specific about exactly when you will add activity. Decide now, write it in your calendar or planner and stick to it. Step Five: Get Support You're much more likely to keep to this plan if the people around you are supporting it. Talk about it! Speak with your friends and family and let them know about your goals. See if they'll agree to help by giving you positive encouragement along the way. Find a partner! Even better, see if you can find someone to join you as a fitness buddy. You can help each other stick with it!

To Keurig or to not?

Does anyone out there (all 11 followers) have a Keurig Brewer?  I thought it would be a nice little holiday present for my husband and I.  We aren't big coffee drinkers, and we like a cup of coffee on occasion.   We have a traditional coffee pot, and when we make a pot, 75% of it goes to waste.  I've heard people talk about these and have seen them advertised and wanted to check them out. 

Wow these things are pricey! On average, the Keurig cost $120-$160.  And on top of that, you have to buy the special K-Cups for it.  Those can run up to $18 for 18.  The good part is that it cost only $1 for a cup of coffee.  The bad part is it cost you $150 to get that one cup of coffee.  I just don't know if I would get my money out of the machine for that price.  Plus they still take up as much room as a traditional coffee pot.

Are there any brewers out there that are similar and cheaper?  I do really like the idea of 1 or 2 cup brewing.

New Photos

Totally random, but I need to add new photos to my blog and redo my header! 

Taco Soup

My husband and I loved this new dish.  Taco Soup.  I loved how easy it was to make and made the house smell wonderful.  I used 2 cans of beans instead of one, and left out the chilis.  Perfect for these cool fall days!

Slow Cook for 6-8 hours on Low.
Ingredients

• 1 pound ground beef
• 1 onion, chopped
• 1 (16 ounce) can chili beans, with liquid
• 1 (15 ounce) can kidney beans with liquid
• 1 (15 ounce) can whole kernel corn, with liquid
• 1 (8 ounce) can tomato sauce
• 2 cups water
• 2 (14.5 ounce) cans peeled and diced tomatoes
• 1 (4 ounce) can diced green chile peppers
• 1 (1.25 ounce) package taco seasoning mix

Directions

1. In a medium skillet, cook the ground beef until browned over medium heat. Drain, and set aside.
2. Place the ground beef, onion, chili beans, kidney beans, corn, tomato sauce, water, diced tomatoes, green chile peppers and taco seasoning mix in a slow cooker. Mix to blend, and cook on Low setting for 8 hours.

Day Zero - House Edition

So here is the list that I've came up with so far for my Day Zero "House Edition". 

Bob Villa, Where are you???

1. buy/install trim in livi room
2. fix basement bath plumbing
3. replace all plug ins & plate covers
4. replae all light switches & plate covers
5. put up outside trim boards
6. put up shutters
7. replace front door or paint
8. repair concrete in back yard
9. build front deck
10. rebuild back deck
11. put up stair trim
12. grout bathroom tile
13. replace front door screen door
14. fix outdoor faucets
15. fix toilet seat and seal upstairs
16. fix shower wall
17. install splash guard in garage for dogs
18. replace or paint trim by outside front door
19. put up sheet rock in laundry room
20. install insulation in laundry room
21. redo front window trim outside
22. fix livi pink bedroom door to make it close
23. put up new sheet rock in base bath
24. repair garage ceiling
25. repair holes in walls
26. build shelves/rods in master bedroom closet

$$ It’s all about the Benjamin’s baby $$
27. buy and install fan for Livi room (purchased June 2011)
28. buy stove (may 2011)
29. buy over counter microwave (may 2011)
30. buy new fridge (may 2011)
31. buy water hose
32. buy rake (sept 2011)
33. buy air conditioner-central air (june 2011)
34. buy heather & install (bought june 2011)
35. buy lawnmower (push mower june 2011)
36. buy charcoal grill (june 2011)
37. buy weed eater (july 2011)

Martha?... Mrs Stewart? A little help please!
38. paint basement
39. set up scrappy room
40. set up man cave
41. paint white wall divider in kitchen
42. put up towel bar in upstairs bath
43. unpack ALL boxes and put in plastic totes
44. paint master closet
45. decorate upstairs bath
46. replace bath light upstairs
47. rebuild front flower bed
48. hang curtains in house
49. hang pictures in bedroom
50. put up jungle stickers on Livi wall (July 2, 2011)
51. put up polka dots stickers in Livi play room (July 2011)
52. buy blinds for house and put up
53. put handles on kitchen cabinets
54. replace vanity handles in bath

OMG I’m a Homeowner!
55. wash windows
56. put up new house numbers
57. replace door locks (july 5 2011)
58. de-clutter bath cabinets and hall closet/cabinets
59. hang pictures in hall
60. fix cracks/leaks in backdoor/front door
61. fix popcorn spots on ceilings
62. install new faucet/sprayer in kitchen
63. throw away rung in laundry room
64. repair front door lock
65. install smoke detectors
66. install carbon monoxide detectors
67. remove cables (black) in rooms and on house
68. remove satellite dish
69. clean ceiling lights in office
70. replace backdoor screen door
71. install door stops
72. clean air ducts
73. wash house
74. buy/install curved shower bar
75. replace shower handle/faucet upstairs
76. install new shower head upstairs (June 2011)
77. replace carpet
78. build or buy storage shed
79. fix kitchen leaking faucet
The Great Outdoors!
80. replace window screens
81. fix fence/gate
82. buy or build dog house
83. remove big rocks in back yard (june 2011)
84. pull trees out of fence line
85. plant flowers
86. replace mailbox
87. paint house
88. replace roof
89. remove brush piles
90. landscape front yard
91. fix front porch light
92. clean up debris from under deck
93. remove nails on outside of house
94. put out solar lights (august 2011
95. plant grass seed
96. repair/redo driveway
97. remove tree stump
98. clean gutters
99. Buy Garden Tools (October 2011)
100. fill in holes with dirt in yard
101. fix drain spouts on ground




　

My New "Personal" Day Zero Project List

Here it is, the new 101 things that I need to do in 1001 days.

MISC CATEGORY

1. Recycle weekly
2. sell clothes on eBay (6)
3. donate clothes (6)
4. have garage sale
5. get red car fixed
6. clean/wash jeep 1x month
7. buy new jeep tires

The Biggest Loser
8. lose 30 pounds by Olivia's 1^st bday
9. lose 1 pound for every item on list
10. lose total of 60 inches over body
11. start walking 2 x week for 6 months (6)
12. Take dogs for walk 1x week
13. Lose 20 inches off waist
14. Decrease BMI by 20 points
15. Walk a mile under 12 minutes
16. Get tested for diabetes yearly (3)
17. No soda for a month twice a year (6)
18. No pizza or wings for a month twice a year (6)

Financial happiness!
19. no credit cards for one month
20. pay off pediatric
21. pay off St Luke's
22. pay off Shawnee mission med
23. pay off medco
24. pay off children's mercy
25. pay off women's clinic
26. pay off avenue
27. pay off Kohl's
28. pay off Nebraska furn mart
29. pay off cap one
30. pay off target red
31. pay off target visa
32. Save $25 a paycheck-Tonya
33. Save $20 a paycheck-Danny
34. start retirement fund
35. Pay off household card
36. Pay off Lowe's
37. Pay off mom
38. Pay off 2 of Danny's collection debts (2)
39. no Walgreen's for one month
40. Spend $250 or less a month at grocery store
41. Go 4 months a year only buying necessities (12)
42. Pay off quest collection debt

Livi’s World
43. throw big party for Olivia 1^st bday
44. start Olivia college fund
45. transfer Livi to new car seat
46. One mommy Livi day a month
47. Teach Olivia to Walk
48. Take Livi to NICU for bday
49. Scrap Olivia year one
50. Scrap Olivia year baby
51. Scrap Olivia year two

Get out and Explore!
52. plan or book trip to Disney world
53. take Olivia to KC zoo
54. take Olivia to Deanna Rose Farmstead
55. take Olivia to Omaha Zoo
56. Visit Joe
57. Visit Oklahoma
58. Go to a concert
59. Go to st Louis
60. Go on one random weekend get away
61. visit gpa Charlie (2)
62. Take Olivia to pumpkin patch (3)
63. Family yearly fishing trip (3)

It’s not always about me!
64. donate to homeless pets
65. renew wildlife membership
66. donate to harvesters (3)
67. donate to toys for tots (3)
68. donate to march for dimes (3)
69. walk march for babies (2)
70. raise money for march of dimes (2)
71. take mom for pedicure
72. take mom dad to dinner (2)
73. Donate to 5 new charities (5) *down syndrome, American cancer society, st Jude's
74. Donate $ to each item not completed
75. Take Danny to OU football game
76. Buy KING headstone
77. Start process to find Danny's biologicals   Sometimes it is all about me!
78. Buy new eye glasses
79. Buy a bra that fits!
80. Learn to speak to Danny without getting upset
81. Only spend 4 hours a week couponing and looking for deals
82. Make a new friend each year (3)
83. Buy an excellent camera
84. Make/keep a mom calendar/planner yearly (3)
85. Blog twice a month (72)
86. Danny Tonya dentist 2x year (6)
87. No complaining for 1 week!
88. date night with friends (4)
89. buy new cell phones



Enjoyments
90. Keep in touch with friends, other then facebook 4x a year (12)
91. Family portrait (3)
92. Host bbq/party
93. Take a photo of a tornado
94. Mail xmas, holiday, bday cards misc cards every year (3)
95. Niece/nephew sleep over (2)


Experiments & Becoming Betty Crocker
96. Learn to make a pie from scratch
97. Take cake decorating class
98. Try sushi
99. try 1 new recipe a month (36)
100. Learn to BBQ
101. Try 10 new restaurants

Others:
No fast food for one month
No eating out for one month
Make a daily "goals" list


　

My new Day Zero Project: 101 things in 1001 days

I know my previous Day Zero project isn't complete, and many items on that list are not able to be completed, however, I need a new one.  In fact, I need two new ones.  One personal and one for my new home.  (what is the day zero project? click here!)

I like the Day Zero project because I like the sense of accomplishment and challenges.  Much of my list may seem simple or silly, however I feel they are things I need to work on, or things that need improvement.  Also, I feel like if it's on paper, then I need to try my best to achieve it.

I've gathered my list and am currently organizing them to post, as I'm sitting here, I'm thinking of more and more things I want to add!  Maybe I should start working on a third list for after these 1001 days are over!
May 17, 2011 - February 11, 2014 - home Day Zero list
October 1, 2011 - June 28, 2014 - personal Day Zero list
(click here to figure out the 1001 days!)

Is rapid weight loss bad for you?

I just read an article I'd like to share.  I've heard that rapid weight loss is bad for you, however, so is being this fat!  There were some good pointers and reminders in the article, so I thought I would share.... Enjoy

A reader emailed me the other day: “Is rapid weight loss dangerous?”
This is actually a fairly common question. And when I see it, here’s what I read between the lines: “How bad would it be if I starved myself to drop a few pounds?”
The answer: Pretty bad. Not because it’s unhealthy—though it can be—but because in the long run this strategy will make you fat. Really.
When it comes to losing weight, how fast is too fast? We asked Men’s Health Weight Loss Coach Alan Aragon, M.S., a nutritionist who works with Olympic and professional athletes, for his perspective. His definition: “Dropping pounds so rapidly that in addition to losing fat, you lose muscle too. This isn’t ‘dangerous’ as in ‘life-threatening,’ but it’s not good for your overall health.”
Here's why: Losing muscle reduces your ability to burn calories and regulate your blood sugar, says Aragon—and, of course, it makes you weaker. (To keep your calorie-burn high, use our 100 greatest fitness tips of all time.) What’s more, lost muscle is often replaced by fat when you stop dieting. The result: You end up looking flabbier than ever. After all, each pound of fat takes up 18 percent more space on your body than each pound of muscle.
Aragon dug into the scientific research to determine the rate that different people could lose weight without losing muscle. His findings:
* Obese to morbidly obese: 3 to 5 pounds per week
* Overweight: 2 to 3 pounds per week
* Lean to average: 1 to 2 pounds per week
* Very Lean: 0.5 to 1 pound per week
AMERICA'S FITTEST FEMALE ATHLETES: We found them and ranked them! See if you agree.
Of course, you can help your cause even more by lifting weights while you diet. Research shows that this can prevent the wasting of muscle, helping ensure your weight loss is pure fat.
The other dangers of rapid weight loss: bone loss, dehydration, and an increased risk of binge eating in some people. “But these are typically the result of severe caloric restriction,”says Aragon. His solution: “I’ve found that you can use a simple formula to calculate a smart and effective caloric intake; it’s based on your target body weight.”
For example, let’s say you’re a man who weighs 220 pounds, but you’d like to tip the scales at 180 pounds. You’ll base your calorie intake on that of a 180-pound guy. Now if you don’t do any resistance exercise (you should!), simply multiply your target body by 11. That’s the minimum number of daily calories you should consume for healthy weight loss, with little risk to your muscles.
If you do lift weights, use 9—instead of 11—and add to that the number of hours you work out per week. So if you exercise one hour a week, you’ll multiply your target body weight by 10. If you exercise two hours a week, you’ll multiply your target body weight by 11; if you exercise three hours a week, you’ll multiply your target body weight by 12; and so on. (The extra activity will allow you to eat more and still lose just as fast.)
Then remember these tips as you start your weight loss program:
1. Prepare to plateau. “Your weight drop will be linear at first, meaning you’ll typically lose a steady amount every week,” says Aragon. “However, as you get lighter, your weight will tend to drop in a stepwise manner. So don’t get discouraged if scale holds for a few days, or even a couple of weeks. The closer you get to your goal, the longer the stalls or plateaus can be.”
2. Take a time out. Every 8 to 12 weeks, take 7 days completely off from dieting. “Don't consciously try to stuff your face, but don't rigidly restrict yourself either,” says Aragon. “This is a good mental and physical break from dieting that allows people to sustain their diets for longer periods.”
3. Redefine progress. “Look at other determinants of success besides the scale,” says Lisa Sasson, R.D., associate professor of nutrition at New York University. Monitor your triglycerides, blood pressure, and body fat percentage. As these numbers improve, you’ll have even more motivation to stick with your eating plan.

*Written by Bill Phillips